I've started slowly reighning my life back in, but it proves hard. I had a shoot yesterday, the first one in a while. After the shoot we BBQ and watched movies, a few people came over... But everyone was too quiet, I'm used to having a way to curb my anxiety, but I wasn't going to drink. So I ended up being reclusive and eventually went off on my own... Felt like once I was done with photography and cooking, I didn't have anything to offer anyone.
I'm lonely, this is the 1st time in 12 years I've actually been single... I've spent a few months here and there single, but technically i was still married, just permanently seperated. I just miss human interaction... I miss love, I miss my kids.
Two days until the doctor. I know this first visit won't help much, but it's a giant step. I should be driving again and doing normal things very soon.
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